Lately, I’ve been feeling like a wreck; but the strangest thing about it is, it doesn’t bother me anymore. I don’t mind that things are out of order or I don’t know what to do about certain situations, because I have learned something about life: Things change. They get worse and they get better.
The things I posses today are things that I once wished for. The situations I’ve overcome now, I once struggled with. The concepts I understand now, once baffled me to the highest degree. That tells me that everything I am facing now is temporary, a path – paving the way for things to come. In moments of misery, I remind myself, this too shall pass. It’s nothing. I got this.
And I embrace it. I embrace it all. I welcome change, discomfort, uncertainty, because in moments like these we grow, we transition, and we learn to value the good in our lives.
Today I am grateful to God for life I’ve been given, the past, present, and future. I’ve never been prouder to be who I am and more thankful for what I have. Through the good and bad I remember, this too shall pass.
Lately ive been doing a lot of reflecting… I am both happy and troubled. The best way I can describe this feeling is a restless peace. Change is coming; I can feel it. I wanted things to change but now I’m excited and terrified at the same time. I feel more dead and more alive than I’ve ever felt in my life, but I would rather feel like this than drift into stagnant living. Whatever’s coming is coming, so I’m reaching out to grab it, to embrace it. This life is a gift and I’m excited for the future and all the wonderful opportunities I have to make something of it. For now all is silent… awaiting…
I recently had one of my out-of-no-where realizations. I never know how to say what’s on my mind in an eloquent fashion, so I’m just going to say it. I’m a traveler. What does that mean and how did I come to that conclusion?
Well first, I analyze things a lot. Secondly, something that has been constant in my life for almost 4 years recently changed. I’m not too shaken up, but it made me wonder. As I reflected and wondered why things happen the way they do, I noticed something; every time I get comfortable, im uprooted. As soon as I adjust to something, it changes.
Oddly, a lot of the people I know seem to lead fairly simple, predictable lives. You know, they live in the same house, have the same friends, graduated from valley middle school and went to valley high school. They seem to have a rarely interrupted routine and a sense of security I’ve never had. I used envy those people, but then I realized if my life was like that I would be bored as….zzz
Oh sorry, I almost fell asleep. As I was saying, if my life was predictable I would be bored. I also realized that change helps you grow. To walk, you must move from a crawling position to walking position. Sometimes life just changes your position, so you can learn something new. It’s a little awkward standing up at first, but once you got it, you got it. Then its time to run. Then its time to talk over the world… or something like that.
So maybe I’m a traveler at heart… that would explain a lot of things about me. It’s funny how I question things only to realize I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. If anyone can relate or has insight to share, go ahead. For now its all good, I’m just following the path as it unfolds in front of me.
I never liked fall or winter. The cloudy days, cold rain, and bare branches always left me in a depressing haze… but recently I had a change of heart. Leave it to me to take something simple and complicate it with deep quotes and over-thinking, but sometimes my over-thinking leads to a positive change.
During my walk a few days ago, I was gazing at bare branches and the most obvious thing dawned on me: It’s only a season… The trees shed their leaves so new ones will grow. Someone will be like… um, DUH… but it was a revelation to me. I always knew this, but never completely understood. This season is not a sad end, but a moment of transition. Then another light turned on.. This applied to my life as well. Moments of loss or emptiness were only a stepping stones to something new… possibly even better than what was before. Sometimes living in the moment is a painful thing to do, but it’s not so bad when you see things for what they are.
The past: Gone
The present: A moment of transition
The future: Unwritten